Sometimes there's a light bulb that goes off in your head, when you suddenly realize you've been fighting with yourself and haven't even known it. Today was such a day for me. I realized that my clothing selection has been a point of contention with myself.
Here's the thing. When I go out on Saturdays or after work during the week, I get excited because I don't have to wear "work clothes." Something about being free of those seems so liberating. And even when I'm not feeling particularly constrained by the concept, the practical side of me thinks I should not get a good work outfit dirty to go out for just a few hours, when it could be good for an entire workday. So here I am, with great social opportunities, able to wear whatever I want and usually with more incentive than usual to try and look cute, and I start rifling through my non-work clothes. That's where the problems begin. That's when I realize that I don't own any cute not work clothes. I don't remember the last time I was willing to spend money on something that I couldn't wear to work--got to get the most bang for my buck! If I can't wear it to work, why would I buy it? Which leaves my wardrobe without many fun things. Or things that are way too fun. Like, even though I don't wear my sparkly purple shirt to work, I do not want to be the girl who wears it to FHE playing Apples to Apples either. So then I go out looking frumpy or, at very least, scowly because I am dirtying something I could wear to work.
It's not like my office is that formal. It is quite relaxed, in fact. And I blame that for my inner turmoil. (That part I'm still working out in my head, but I'm pretty sure I'll get there soon.)
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